REFLECTIONS ON LIFE, AN INTERESTING AND CANDID SELF ASSESSMENT, AS WE LOOK BACK UPON OUR LIVES

 

There is nothing more important and more beautiful and more intriguing than the thoughts we have about ourselves and how we perceive the world around us.

No one is privy to your private thoughts but you. No one else is privy to your own private world but you. This includes all of the many private thoughts which cross our minds daily. Thoughts about ourselves, others, and situations we observe. We have thoughts about love, about people we like and people we don’t like, thoughts about our children, our friends, relatives and acquaintances. You could be smiling with someone and your private thoughts are harboring the very worst about that person and they would never know it. Thoughts about sex, studies have shown; having daily thoughts about sex are common among both men and women. Boy, aren’t we glad our thoughts about sex are private. Your private thoughts and your reflections are a whole other world unto it self. I am hoping as you read this, you will find situations in Reflections of Life which may parallel your own life. This is about you and only you. When you explore deeper into your own psyche, you will be able to do a closer examination of your emotions; which are the cause and effect for most of the decisions you have made in your life. Once you have basis for understanding the raw emotions; which are the reasons for these decisions you have made, you will begin to really understand why you made these decisions. Hopefully you will strive for as long as you live to become the best person you possibly can be. So many of us have just grazed the surface of who we are and what we can become. You have never been challenged to bring out all the positive potential you possess and the possible greatness that lives within you and each and every one of us. A birth certificate shows you were born, a death certificate shows that you died. Our reflections of life will be our reminder and our account of how we lived. The gift of life is the time you are allowed on this earth to become the kind of person you want to be.

 

The reflections of your life, will reveal the good, the bad and everything in between, I know we all look back and wonder, how we could have made our lives better, more satisfying and meaningful.

 

 Reflections of life is a combination of all our lives experiences, all the things we have seen, all the things we have done and all of life's choices we have made. Reflections of life will be your mirror into your life, where you will recall images and slices of your life. It will reflect the good times and the bad times, the sad times and the happy times, reflecting on the emotional highs and lows of your life and everything in between. You will reflect on the loves of your life which were good, and the loves of your life which were devastating. It is my belief we are all unique and wonderful individuals, whose lives are unique in their own way. Your life and your reflections belong only to you. Your life is the only one exactly like it in the whole world. Only you, have done all the things in the exact same way at the exact same time, with the exact range of emotions, and your unique sequence of thoughts, about what you are doing and why you are doing it. You have your own unique way of reacting to what you have seen, what you hear, what you feel, and how you express yourself about any given situation you encounter from day to day.

 

It is all the above which says you are unique and there is no other person in the whole world quite like you. You are one-of-a-kind. When you reflect back on your life you think to yourself. What if I had done things differently, or reacted to situations in my life differently, or said things differently? Did I do some things I shouldn't have done? Did I not do some things, I should have done? What if you had made decisions and choices opposite of the ones you actually made? How different would your life be today? Would you be living in the same city or state? Would you be employed in the same line of work? Would you have chosen the same spouse and have the same family? Your life in its entirety is directly tied to the results of the choices you have made. As we, reflect back up on our lives. We many times reevaluate those choices, and wonder what my life would be like if I had made other choices different from the ones I made. In some of the scenarios, you might imagine how your life could be completely different. I know you will forever wonder what course your life might have taken had you made other choices. You will always wonder, WHAT IF? WHAT IF? WHAT IF? I know you have heard the term, hindsight. As you reflect back up on your life, you probably thought if only I had hindsight I would have not had made this choice or that choice. But we all know no one has the ability to predict the future. When one makes choices, no one knows whether those choices will end up being good or bad.

Reflections of life, allows one to look back and make a sober survey of one's triumphs and of one's failures, one's love life, good, bad or indifferent, one's mood or outlook on life. If your outlook on life; is not good. What other choices could you have made; which would have made it better? As you reflect back up on your life and gaze into life's mirror. Do you see that person you've always wanted to be? Is your family situation what you wanted it to be or what you thought it would be? Are you happy with the way the way your life has turned out? If not, what are some of those pivotal choices you made or you did not make; which could have made a difference?

As you reflect back on all the choices you have made in life. You must realize it is those choices and only those choices; which determine all aspects of your life as you know it today. I only hope all the choices you’ve made in the past and the ones you will make in the future will be the ones which will bring you a great deal of happiness and contentment. 

 

I want you to recreate the feelings and emotions you had at that time you faced those turning points in your life. I would ask you, how have the decisions you have made, get you to this point in your life, and where do you go from here? I am going to put your reflections of life on a personal level. If I could open up a window to your mind and speak directly to you. I would say to you the life you have now will be your only chance you have to get it right. There are no second chances. Many of us are afraid to venture out, to test ourselves when it comes to our dreams and our ambitions. Deep down we know we have the ability to do more.  We are afraid of change, afraid of rocking the boat; afraid of the unknown. I would also say to you, the worst possible thoughts and feelings you will ever experience, when your life is coming to an end; will be the doubts or regrets about how you lived your life and about the things you wish you would have done. I would also ask you this question, did you do everything you could do, to make the reflections of your life, the best, most fulfilling and productive life it could have been? I put the greatest emphasis on fulfilling. You must give yourself the ultimate grade for this test. Was your life what you wanted it to be, or what you expected it to be? Only you, can give yourself the final grade for this test. I call this the ‘Test of Life’, how was your performance in life’s test? Did you pass, did you fail, or did you fall some where in the middle? The bigger question may be, how does one go about judging themselves? By what kind of measurements or standards can anyone’s life be judged? There are so many different levels and degrees of success and failure, where does one start this process? Let’s take a look at the sum of one’s life.

 

There are some, who have created businesses which made them millionaires, or even billionaires, if you did not, so what? There are some, who have found cures which saved thousands or millions of lives, if you did not, so what? There are some, who have written the next great novel, if you did not, so what? And what if you did not make enough money to have that grand house you always wanted and were not able to buy all of the material things you desired. And if you had a mundane and unsatisfying job, so what? Let’s look at the other side of the coin. But what if you raised a family of healthy and happy children and gave them a good start in life? And you were able to fulfill some of your dreams and you were able to accomplish some of your goals in life which you set for yourself. If you feel your fulfillment in life has been rewarding, regardless of your stature in life, or your place in history. If you feel your life’s score has been on the plus side. Your reflections of life will be satisfying.

 

 

 

On the following pages you will see some epilogues with a corresponding song/poem. These epilogues and song/poems reflect the many different and varied aspects if our lives. Let us see if any of these situations may have some reflections of your life or reflections of someone else’s life, you may have known.

 


        LIFE’S THE BIGGEST GAMBLE OF THEM ALL

 

Everybody loves the game of chance. Whether it's betting on the lottery, Las Vegas style gambling, betting on the horse racing and dog racing; or sports betting, football, basketball, baseball etc. It is entwined in the fabric of America. There's gambling everywhere you go. Some states, cities and other areas are so dependent on gambling; they must have these revenues to keep their governments functioning. Why gamble? Because, we as a people, love to gamble. We gamble with the hope of getting enough money to get out of debt. We gamble to win enough money to be able to afford the things we could never afford on our salaries. We gamble for a chance to hit the jackpot to get rich. Or get richer by hitting a mega jackpot. Some have even become super rich. I for one, have never hit a jackpot, maybe I'm just unlucky. Hey, I shouldn't complain I'm still alive and I have my health. I thought to myself, you know just getting out of bed in the morning and making it through the whole day unscathed is a gamble. Many people who get up that morning never return. There are so many tragic things which happen to people every day. And think of all the different kinds of illnesses, many which can lead to one's death. I said to myself life is one hell of a gamble. It could be ‘The Biggest Gamble of Them All’. Look and you will see what I mean.

 


           LIFE’S THE BIGGEST GAMBLE OF THEM ALL

 

 

I've often play the game of chance.

You go up and sometimes you fall.

I learned after all the bets I've made.

Life’s the biggest gamble of them all.

 

 

I've cheated a bit, I lied a bit.

To me, life was one big ball.

I'll need all the luck I can get, to win.

Life’s the biggest gamble of them all.

 

 

We should all know the rules of life.

Everyone must pay their dues.

If you cheat and lie, to your fellow man.

It's a gamble you will surely lose.

 

 

I'm still setting here with aces.

I know the Lord's going to give me a call.

As of yet, I haven't lost this bet.

Life’s the biggest gamble of them all

 

 

  DIVORCE WAS NOT THE WAY FOR ME

 

You know, getting a divorce is becoming as common as buying a new pair of shoes. I guess people really don't work at marriage anymore. Getting a divorce is like missing a train. You say to yourself, “I can always catch the next one.” If you miss the next one, there is always one after that. What happened to, I will love you forever and till death do us part. All I can say is there are an awful lot of people who have parted: but they are still living. Has divorce become just a game that people play? Is it like the game of poker, if you lose, you just say what the hell, and just find another game? It seems to be a national affliction which affects a large segment of the population. Many marriages aren’t really marriages at all. They're very loose partnerships with a license. Which eventually end up in a divorce, even after being married 20, 30, 40 or more years. It's like a deep dark hole, where once happy marriages are thrown into, and never come out. There's no shame, no remorse, no regrets; in short there is no stigma whatsoever attached to divorce.

The divorce train is getting longer and longer as more people hop on for the ride. I don't see that train of misery getting any shorter. The trail of broken hearts, broken spirits and broken families, litter the highway of dreams. I know when most of you got married and repeated those vows. I believe you meant what you said in front of the minister. You said, you would stay through sickness and health, through good times and bad, till death do us part.

If you could go back, would you be so quick to turn, your, I do, into I don't? Would you again take your, I will, and turn it into, I won’t. What happens to people who profess undying love for the other and in time will do a One Hundred Eighty Degree turn. How does undying love turn into hate and disgust? Those feelings of love you had for each other have now turned into distrust and contempt. If I were to try to describe all the emotional, and the mental ups and downs of a marriage, and all the unbelievable changes which take place. My short answer would be, it is, what it is, what it is.

But all is not lost. Let me tell you the story of this woman who would not accept divorce as the easy way out. She said my marriage is worth saving no matter how ragged it’s gets around the edges. The quality she had is one which most of us don’t have. The determination, to see her marriage through to the end. The determination; not to give up, when things got tough. The Determination, to prevail against all odds. She said simply, divorce was not the way for me.

 

 

 

         DIVORCE WAS NOT THE WAY FOR ME

 

We walked down the aisle to say these words.

Till death, this will always be.

There were times, I almost gave up.

But, divorce was not the way for me.

 

I've caught you lying, and cheating too.

Others would have wanted to be free.

Divorce may be the most popular game in town.

But, divorce was not the way for me.

 

My parents were married, for 50 years.

Ups and downs were a part of their life.

You're the only man, our kids will call Daddy.

And, I will always be your wife.

 

There is lesson, for all who listen

In time, an acorn will become a giant oak tree.

Like the tree, our love has withstood the test of time. 

Divorce, was not the way for me. 

 

 

        YOU WANTED MORE THAN ANYONE CAN GIVE

 

You know, there are some of us in life; who always want things to be perfect. There are some of us who want and demand perfection in other people. First of all, what is perfection and how do we describe it? We all have different ideas, views and thoughts about perfection. In every phase of our lives, there are degrees in everything we see touch and feel in life. When we look at other people, we look for certain degrees of perfection in that person. There are degrees of beauty, or looks, degrees of intelligence, degrees of character; even degrees in a person’s disposition, and their outlook on life. These varying degrees of perfection which you look for in other people, will determine the way you judge that person and how that person rates with you.

Why do we expect a certain degree of perfection in others, when we ourselves fall so short when using the same criteria? It is because we cannot see ourselves as others see us and don’t recognize our own shortcomings and imperfections. Many of us demand a great deal of perfection in others; which is unreasonable, unfair, and irrational. I am sure you would feel the same way if you were being judged by the same standards. We somehow feel if the other person is going to be a part of our lives, we expect them to have a certain degree of perfection. You may have no idea of how devastating the mental and emotional pressure which you are putting on the other person can be. How can you expect another person; to live up to your ill advised and irrational model of perfection? I am sure you have no idea of how much emotional damage and harm you are doing to the other person, especially in a marriage or a romantic relationship. Your mate may try to please you by trying to live up to your unjust and psychologically damaging expectations of perfection. It is these kinds of reckless and unfair demands. Which can put that person, on a slippery slope on which human emotions sometimes hang by a thread? The relentless pressure you put on the other person can sometimes cause that thread to unravel. Your actions can cause your mate to suffer from severe mental depression, a nervous breakdown, thoughts of suicide and even committing suicide. Make no mistake; you are inflicting very serious mental abuse. No matter what they do to please you; it's never enough. I am going to tell you about this person who gave up after years of attempting to live up to the other person’s idea of perfection. This particular relationship did not survive. When we ask why, the answer given was, you wanted more than anyone could give.

 

 

         YOU WANTED MORE THAN ANYONE CAN GIVE

 

 

I gave you my heart, my mind and my soul

Yet, it wasn't enough for you.

You shattered my heart, you destroyed my soul

You said I didn’t have a clue

 

I tried to change, to be what you ask

You are the reason, I live.

No matter what I did, it was never enough.

You wanted more, than anyone can give.

 

I gave you three beautiful children.

I did everything you ask me to do

Too many faults, not perfect you said

You left, and said we were thru.

 

How can I tell, those three little kids.

I no longer, have a reason to live.

You should know, nobody’s perfect

You wanted more, than anyone can give.




YOU WILL FIND MORE EPILOGUES AND SONG/POEMS IN THE BOOK.