There is nothing more
important and more beautiful and more intriguing than the thoughts we have
about ourselves and how we perceive the world around us.
No one is privy to your
private thoughts but you. No one else is privy to your own private world but
you. This includes all of the many private thoughts which cross our minds
daily. Thoughts about ourselves, others,
and situations we observe. We have thoughts about love, about people we like
and people we don’t like, thoughts about our children, our friends, relatives
and acquaintances. You could be smiling
with someone and your private thoughts are harboring the very worst about that
person and they would never know it. Thoughts about sex, studies have shown;
having daily thoughts about sex are common among both men and women. Boy, aren’t we glad our thoughts about sex
are private. Your private thoughts and
your reflections are a whole other world unto it self. I am hoping as you read this, you will find
situations in Reflections of Life which may parallel your own life. This is
about you and only you. When you explore
deeper into your own psyche, you will be able to do a closer examination of
your emotions; which are the cause and effect for most of the decisions you have
made in your life. Once you have basis for understanding the raw emotions;
which are the reasons for these decisions you have made, you will begin to
really understand why you made these decisions. Hopefully you will strive for
as long as you live to become the best person you possibly can be. So many of us have just grazed the surface of
who we are and what we can become. You
have never been challenged to bring out all the positive potential you possess
and the possible greatness that lives within you and each and every one of us. A
birth certificate shows you were born, a death certificate shows that you died.
Our reflections of life will be our reminder and our account of how we
lived. The gift of life is the time you
are allowed on this earth to become the kind of person you want to be.
The reflections of your life,
will reveal the good, the bad and everything in between, I know we all look
back and wonder, how we could have made our lives better, more satisfying and
meaningful.
Reflections of life is a combination of all
our lives experiences, all the things we have seen, all the things we have done
and all of life's choices we have made. Reflections of life will be your mirror into your life, where you will
recall images and slices of your life. It will reflect the good times and the bad times, the sad times and the
happy times, reflecting on the emotional highs and lows of your life and
everything in between. You will reflect
on the loves of your life which were good, and the loves of your life which
were devastating. It is my belief we are all unique and wonderful individuals,
whose lives are unique in their own way. Your life and your reflections belong only to you. Your life is the only one exactly like it in
the whole world. Only you, have done all
the things in the exact same way at the exact same time, with the exact range
of emotions, and your unique sequence of thoughts, about what you are doing and
why you are doing it. You have your own
unique way of reacting to what you have seen, what you hear, what you feel, and
how you express yourself about any given situation you encounter from day to
day.
It is all the above which
says you are unique and there is no other person in the whole world quite like
you. You are one-of-a-kind. When you reflect back on your life you think
to yourself. What if I had done things
differently, or reacted to situations in my life differently, or said things
differently? Did I do some things I
shouldn't have done? Did I not do some
things, I should have done? What if you
had made decisions and choices opposite of the ones you actually made? How
different would your life be today? Would you be living in the same city or state? Would you be employed in the same line of
work? Would you have chosen the same spouse
and have the same family? Your life in
its entirety is directly tied to the results of the choices you have made. As
we, reflect back up on our lives. We many times reevaluate those choices, and
wonder what my life would be like if I had made other choices different from the
ones I made. In some of the scenarios,
you might imagine how your life could be completely different. I know you will forever
wonder what course your life might have taken had you made other choices. You
will always wonder, WHAT IF? WHAT IF? WHAT IF? I know you have heard the term,
hindsight. As you reflect back up on
your life, you probably thought if only I had hindsight I would have not had
made this choice or that choice. But we
all know no one has the ability to predict the future. When one makes choices, no one knows whether
those choices will end up being good or bad.
Reflections of life, allows
one to look back and make a sober survey of one's triumphs and of one's
failures, one's love life, good, bad or indifferent, one's mood or outlook on
life. If your outlook on life; is not
good. What other choices could you have
made; which would have made it better? As you reflect back up on your life and
gaze into life's mirror. Do you see that
person you've always wanted to be? Is
your family situation what you wanted it to be or what you thought it would
be? Are you happy with the way the way
your life has turned out? If not, what are some of those pivotal choices you
made or you did not make; which could have made a difference?
As you reflect back on all
the choices you have made in life. You must realize it is those choices and
only those choices; which determine all aspects of your life as you know it
today. I only hope all the choices
you’ve made in the past and the ones you will make in the future will be the
ones which will bring you a great deal of happiness and contentment.
I want you to recreate the
feelings and emotions you had at that time you faced those turning points in
your life. I would ask you, how have the decisions you have made, get you to
this point in your life, and where do you go from here? I am going to put your
reflections of life on a personal level. If I could open up a window to your
mind and speak directly to you. I would say to you the life you have now will
be your only chance you have to get it right. There are no second chances. Many of us are afraid to venture out, to test
ourselves when it comes to our dreams and our ambitions. Deep down we know we have the ability to do
more. We are afraid of change, afraid of
rocking the boat; afraid of the unknown. I would also say to you, the worst
possible thoughts and feelings you will ever experience, when your life is
coming to an end; will be the doubts or regrets about how you lived your life
and about the things you wish you would have done. I would also ask you this question, did you
do everything you could do, to make the reflections of your life, the best,
most fulfilling and productive life it could have been? I put the greatest emphasis on
fulfilling. You must give yourself the
ultimate grade for this test. Was your
life what you wanted it to be, or what you expected it to be? Only you, can
give yourself the final grade for this test. I call this the ‘Test of Life’, how was your performance in life’s
test? Did you pass, did you fail, or did
you fall some where in the middle? The bigger question may be, how does one go
about judging themselves? By what kind of measurements or standards can
anyone’s life be judged? There are so many different levels and degrees of
success and failure, where does one start this process? Let’s take a look at
the sum of one’s life.
There are some, who have
created businesses which made them millionaires, or even billionaires, if you
did not, so what? There are some, who have found cures which saved thousands or
millions of lives, if you did not, so what? There are some, who have written
the next great novel, if you did not, so what? And what if you did not make
enough money to have that grand house you always wanted and were not able to
buy all of the material things you desired. And if you had a mundane and
unsatisfying job, so what? Let’s look at the other side of the coin. But what if you raised a family of healthy
and happy children and gave them a good start in life? And you were able to fulfill some of your
dreams and you were able to accomplish some of your goals in life which you set
for yourself. If you feel your
fulfillment in life has been rewarding, regardless of your stature in life, or
your place in history. If you feel your life’s score has been on the plus
side. Your reflections of life will be
satisfying.
On the following pages you will see some epilogues with a corresponding song/poem. These epilogues and song/poems reflect the many different and varied aspects if our lives. Let us see if any of these situations
may have some reflections of your life or reflections of someone else’s life,
you may have known.
Everybody loves the game of
chance. Whether it's betting on the lottery,
I've often play the game of
chance.
You go up and sometimes you
fall.
I learned after all the bets
I've made.
Life’s the biggest gamble of
them all.
I've cheated a bit, I lied a
bit.
To me, life was one big ball.
I'll need all the luck I can
get, to win.
Life’s the biggest gamble of
them all.
We should all know the rules
of life.
Everyone must pay their dues.
If you cheat and lie, to your
fellow man.
It's a gamble you will surely
lose.
I'm still setting here with
aces.
I know the Lord's going to
give me a call.
As of yet, I haven't lost
this bet.
Life’s the biggest gamble of
them all
You know, getting a divorce
is becoming as common as buying a new pair of shoes. I guess people really don't work at marriage
anymore. Getting a divorce is like missing a train. You say to yourself, “I can
always catch the next one.” If you miss the next one, there is always one after
that. What happened to, I will love you
forever and till death do us part. All I
can say is there are an awful lot of people who have parted: but they are still
living. Has divorce become just a game that people play? Is it like the game of poker, if you lose,
you just say what the hell, and just find another game? It seems to be a
national affliction which affects a large segment of the population. Many marriages aren’t really marriages at
all. They're very loose partnerships
with a license. Which eventually end up in a divorce, even after being married
20, 30, 40 or more years. It's like a
deep dark hole, where once happy marriages are thrown into, and never come
out. There's no shame, no remorse, no
regrets; in short there is no stigma whatsoever attached to divorce.
The divorce train is getting
longer and longer as more people hop on for the ride. I don't see that train of misery getting any
shorter. The trail of broken hearts,
broken spirits and broken families, litter the highway of dreams. I know when most of you got married and
repeated those vows. I believe you meant
what you said in front of the minister. You said, you would stay through
sickness and health, through good times and bad, till death do us part.
If you could go back, would
you be so quick to turn, your, I do, into I don't? Would you again take your, I will, and turn
it into, I won’t. What happens to people
who profess undying love for the other and in time will do a One Hundred Eighty
Degree turn. How does undying love turn
into hate and disgust? Those feelings
of love you had for each other have now turned into distrust and contempt. If I were to try to describe all the
emotional, and the mental ups and downs of a marriage, and all the unbelievable
changes which take place. My short
answer would be, it is, what it is, what it is.
But all is not lost. Let me tell you the story of this woman who
would not accept divorce as the easy way out. She said my marriage is worth
saving no matter how ragged it’s gets around the edges. The quality she had is one which most of us
don’t have. The determination, to see her marriage through to the end. The determination; not to give up, when
things got tough. The Determination, to prevail against all odds. She said simply, divorce was not the way for
me.
DIVORCE WAS NOT THE WAY FOR ME
We walked down the aisle to
say these words.
Till death, this will always
be.
There were times, I almost
gave up.
But, divorce was not the way
for me.
I've caught you lying, and
cheating too.
Others would have wanted to
be free.
Divorce may be the most
popular game in town.
But, divorce was not the way
for me.
My parents were married, for
50 years.
Ups and downs were a part of
their life.
You're the only man, our kids
will call Daddy.
And, I will always be your
wife.
There is lesson, for all who
listen
In time, an acorn will become
a giant oak tree.
Like the tree, our love has
withstood the test of time.
Divorce, was not the way for
me.
YOU WANTED MORE THAN ANYONE CAN GIVE
You know, there are some of
us in life; who always want things to be perfect. There are some of us who want and demand
perfection in other people. First of
all, what is perfection and how do we describe it? We all have different ideas, views and
thoughts about perfection. In every
phase of our lives, there are degrees in everything we see touch and feel in
life. When we look at other people, we
look for certain degrees of perfection in that person. There are degrees of
beauty, or looks, degrees of intelligence, degrees of character; even degrees
in a person’s disposition, and their outlook on life. These varying degrees of perfection which you
look for in other people, will determine the way you judge that person and how
that person rates with you.
Why do we expect a certain
degree of perfection in others, when we ourselves fall so short when using the
same criteria? It is because we cannot
see ourselves as others see us and don’t recognize our own shortcomings and
imperfections. Many of us demand a great
deal of perfection in others; which is unreasonable, unfair, and irrational. I
am sure you would feel the same way if you were being judged by the same
standards. We somehow feel if the other
person is going to be a part of our lives, we expect them to have a certain
degree of perfection. You may have no idea of how devastating the mental and
emotional pressure which you are putting on the other person can be. How can
you expect another person; to live up to your ill advised and irrational model
of perfection? I am sure you have no
idea of how much emotional damage and harm you are doing to the other person,
especially in a marriage or a romantic relationship. Your mate may try to please you by trying to
live up to your unjust and psychologically damaging expectations of perfection.
It is these kinds of reckless and unfair demands. Which can put that person, on
a slippery slope on which human emotions sometimes hang by a thread? The
relentless pressure you put on the other person can sometimes cause that thread
to unravel. Your actions can cause your
mate to suffer from severe mental depression, a nervous breakdown, thoughts of
suicide and even committing suicide. Make no mistake; you are inflicting very serious mental abuse. No matter
what they do to please you; it's never enough. I am going to tell you about
this person who gave up after years of attempting to live up to the other
person’s idea of perfection. This particular relationship did not survive. When we ask why, the answer given was, you
wanted more than anyone could give.
YOU WANTED MORE THAN ANYONE CAN GIVE
I gave you my heart, my mind
and my soul
Yet, it wasn't enough for
you.
You shattered my heart, you
destroyed my soul
You said I didn’t have a clue
I tried to change, to be what
you ask
You are the reason, I live.
No matter what I did, it was
never enough.
You wanted more, than anyone
can give.
I gave you three beautiful
children.
I did everything you ask me
to do
Too many faults, not perfect
you said
You left, and said we were
thru.
How can I tell, those three
little kids.
I no longer, have a reason to
live.
You should know, nobody’s
perfect
You wanted more, than anyone can give.
YOU WILL FIND MORE EPILOGUES AND SONG/POEMS IN THE BOOK.